Expecting a child is a time of excitement and anticipation, but it can also be overwhelming and stressful, especially when you are expecting twins, triplets or more in a fast-paced city like Singapore. When faced with the added pressures of a high-risk pregnancy, frequent doctor's appointments, and the prospect of caring for newborns on top of juggling other commitments, many of us find it hard to cope with the load.
In this article, we will explore some strategies for coping with prenatal (antenatal) depression as a parent of multiples.
"I was crying at the smallest of things, things that wouldn't normally affect me. It was hard to share it with anyone as most people viewed pregnancy as a very happy period of time."
– Melanie, twin mum
Recognize the Symptoms
The first step in coping with prenatal depression is recognizing the symptoms.
Prenatal depression can manifest in different ways for different people, but some common symptoms include:
- Feeling sad, anxious, or hopeless
- Losing interest in activities you once enjoyed
- Difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much
- Changes in appetite
- Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
You can consider these self-help tips to improve your mood:
Reach Out for Support
Sometimes you may feel like you need to handle everything on your own, but really, you don't have to. Reach out to your partner, family, and friends for support. Joining a support group for parents of multiples can also be a great way to connect with others who are going through similar experiences. Remember, it is perfectly okay to ask for help.
Take Care of Yourself
Taking care of yourself is essential for managing prenatal depression. This means eating a healthy and balanced diet, staying active, and getting enough rest. Try to carve out some time each day to do something you enjoy, whether it's taking a walk, reading a book, or spending time with friends. Self-care can also mean seeking professional help if you need it. Don't be afraid to talk to your healthcare provider about your mental health and ask for a referral to a therapist or counsellor.
Manage Your Stress
Managing stress is crucial for coping with prenatal depression. As a parent of multiples, you may have a lot on your plate, so it's important to find ways to manage your stress. This can include doing relaxing activities such as deep breathing, meditation, yoga or listening to music.
Spend Time In Nature
Spending time in nature, whether it's a park or a hiking trail, can help reduce feelings of stress and promote a sense of well-being. The physical activity will also help reduce tension and release endorphins.
Manage Your Time
Managing time effectively can help reduce stress. This can include creating a schedule, setting realistic goals, and prioritising your tasks. Avoid the temptation to do it all!
Practice Gratitude
Studies have shown that gratitude can help shift our focus from negative to positive experiences, reduce stress, and improve overall well-being. Try to find joy in the small moments. One way to practise gratitude is to write down three things you are grateful for each day, no matter how small they may seem. Another way is to express gratitude to someone else, either through a thank you note or by telling them in person.
Here's a poster in case you'd like to save it for reference:
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If you find that someone around you might be experiencing prenatal depression, offer your support and be sensitive to her needs.
Coping with prenatal depression as an expectant parent of multiples can be challenging. Remember to recognize the symptoms, reach out for support, take care of yourself, manage your stress, and stay positive. Most importantly, know that you are not alone.
If you experience the symptoms described above for more than two weeks, or if they are affecting your ability to function in your daily life, do seek out professional help.
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Suicide Prevention and Crisis Helplines in Singapore
IMH Mental Health Helpline: Dial 6389 2222 [24 hours, daily]
Singapore Association for Mental Health (SAMH): Dial 1800 283 7019 [Mon-Fri, 9am-6pm, excludes PH]
Samaritans of Singapore (SOS): Dial 1767 [24 hours, daily]
SOS Care Text (Chatbox): https://www.sos.org.sg [24 hours, daily]
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