Raising triplets is a unique experience, but parenting gifted teenage triplets adds an entirely new layer of complexity. In this edition of the Spotlight Series on Multiples Matter, we speak with Winnie Puah, mother of 13-year-old fraternal triplets Asher Lee, Brayden Lee, and Charlotte Lee, about the challenges and rewards of raising highly intellectual multiples.
Now living in the U.S. after moving from Singapore, Winnie shares her insights on fostering individuality, balancing academics and extracurriculars, and maintaining strong family bonds—all while ensuring her children thrive both intellectually and emotionally.
Discovering Giftedness
How did you discover your triplets were gifted?
As new immigrants to the U.S., we had no direct comparison for our children’s development, so we simply assumed they were quick learners. It wasn’t until they sat for a school-wide gifted test in Year 4, at age 10, that we received official confirmation. Each of them excels in different areas—one is a natural storyteller and musician, another is a strategic thinker with strong public speaking skills, and the third is highly analytical, excelling in maths and science. Understanding their unique strengths helped us tailor our support while reinforcing their sibling bond.
How does their intellectual curiosity shape your home learning environment?
It’s like living in a mini think tank! Picture three young philosophers debating concepts like ‘Does zero truly exist?’ or ‘Is cloning ethical?’ Each has their own passions—coding, creative writing, engineering—so our home is filled with books, STEM kits, and puzzles. We connect their interests to real-world experiences through workshops, science fairs, and hands-on projects. However, we also emphasise balance, reminding them that curiosity is a lifelong journey that should be enjoyable, not overwhelming.
Balancing Individuality and Sibling Bonds
How do you encourage each of your triplets to embrace their individuality while maintaining a strong sibling connection?
Triplets share a unique connection, but they are distinct individuals. We encourage them to pursue their own interests—one enjoys sports, another is passionate about music, and the third thrives in maths competitions. At the same time, we create shared experiences, such as family movie nights and trips, to maintain their strong bond. The key is balancing ‘me’ time with ‘we’ time, allowing them to develop as individuals while staying close as siblings.
Has one of them ever felt left out? How do you handle it?
Absolutely. With triplets, it’s common for two to naturally pair up, leaving the third feeling excluded. When this happens, we make an extra effort to give the left-out child more attention.
I also ensure I spend one-on-one time with each of them—whether it’s a chat in the car, helping with their hobbies, or bedtime conversations. Open communication is crucial in ensuring every child feels valued and heard.
How do they navigate comparison and competition?
They compare themselves constantly—whether in academics, sports, or even gaming. While we don’t actively promote competition, we acknowledge their natural drive to challenge each other. Our focus is on celebrating each child’s unique achievements and reinforcing the idea that success isn’t a zero-sum game. When one succeeds, we remind the others that their turn will come too—and when it does, they’d want the same support in return.
Academics & Extracurriculars
How do you support your triplets academically and in extracurricular activities?
Managing schoolwork and activities requires meticulous planning. We prioritise their schedules, break tasks into manageable steps, and set realistic goals. Outside of school, they participate in advanced programmes such as Kumon, Science Olympiad, and coding courses to keep them engaged. The aim is to foster a love for learning without overwhelming them.
Have they faced academic challenges despite being gifted?
Yes, but not due to difficulty—rather, engagement. Because they learn quickly, they sometimes find school repetitive and struggle with motivation.
We changed schools a few times to find one that truly challenged them.
Enriching their education with external learning opportunities has also helped sustain their curiosity.
What’s an extracurricular activity you were initially unsure about but turned out to be a great fit?
Kung fu! We enrolled them at age nine for exercise and self-defence, not knowing if they’d stick with it. They ended up excelling, eventually making it to the U.S. National Team. They’ve trained at China’s Shaolin Temple, competed internationally, and even attended an elite youth training programme. It was an unexpected but rewarding journey.
Teenage Social Life & Family Dynamics
Do they have separate friend groups, or do they prefer socialising together?
It’s a mix. Each has their own circle of friends based on their interests, which we encourage to help them develop their identities. At the same time, they enjoy spending time together and often bring friends into their sibling circle. We maintain an open and supportive home environment where they feel comfortable inviting friends over for study sessions or movie nights.
How has your family routine changed now that they’re teenagers?
Managing triplet teens is like coordinating three CEOs! They’re more independent now, but their schedules are packed. We’ve transitioned from managing nap times to tracking extracurricular activities and social events. Communication and planning are key—we ensure responsibilities are shared fairly and make time for family bonding through meals and shared activities.
What’s one special tradition that keeps them connected?
Movie nights. No matter how hectic life gets, we always carve out time to watch a film together. It’s a simple but meaningful way to stay connected.
Final Advice for Parents of Teenage Multiples
What’s your biggest takeaway from parenting teenage triplets?
Parenting multiples is incredibly rewarding but comes with its own set of challenges.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is that perfection isn’t the goal. Some days are chaotic, and that’s perfectly okay.
What advice would you give to other parents of teenage multiples?
- Embrace the messy moments. Things won’t always go as planned, and that’s part of the journey.
- Lean on your support system. Asking for help is a strength, not a weakness.
- Make time for yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so prioritise self-care.
- Focus on progress, not perfection. Celebrate small wins because every step forward matters.
–––
We thank Winnie Puah for her generous sharing. Indeed, raising gifted triplets is a unique parenting journey, requiring thoughtful support, structure, and flexibility. Whether you're raising twins, triplets, or a large family, finding a supportive parenting community makes all the difference. Join the conversation and share your experience with us!
